It’s Stupid to apologize for going through shit, but I could’ve handled it all with a bit more Grace.

God that sounds retarded given the shit I’ve been through this year.

I use these accounts to vent my Emotions, but sorry to you guys.

I’ll do my best to keep Spirits Up.

And to get shit done.

I’ll be working a lot more on my SFW/NSFW Alts too, making new ones when needed.

Newgrounds and DeviantArt are good if you just want my Artwork. But with any alt I make I’ll try to keep it Rant-Free. Except for NSFW Alts.

Have A Good One Ya’ll

Felt like saying this since with all that’s been happening I haven’t been able to do as much as I’ve wanted Art-Wise this year and it’s already April basically. And I’ve spat a lot of Venom/Angst here.

But I’ve gotten a lot done despite everything. So things should settle.

🫶

Well actually to put a pin in this.

It’s foolish to apologize for feeling all this Grief and Shit, tho I am since I’d rather Fight or Explore these feelings with my Art. I am free to express all that here, but I don’t want to worry anyone.

There’s more I wanna say but I don’t wanna ramble. My Family and I are doing better, we’re all still hurting definitely but we’re getting on track. So yeah enough of all this for now. Love ya mwah 😘

Ok.

So, I have two weeks to make some very life-altering decisions. That’ll affect the next decade and how much Time & Freedom I have for everything. Everything. That’s at least until I turn 35-36 being decided in less than 14 days.

So needless to say, I won’t be around much.

Frankly it’s really weighing on my mind right now. And I have so, so much to consider.

It’s times like these I really wish I wasn’t disabled. So that wouldn’t be a huge factor along with the dozens of others swirling around my head.

But at the same time, being disabled does give me the luxury of time to think on important things without too much flippancy. Even if my mind currently feels at deadlock.

Maybe God does exist.

Anyway. Guess I just came back to say I’ll be gone even longer. Take care.

Previous Update + Artist Introduction: https://cyberneticshotokan.newgrounds.com/news/post/1518213

The Aforementioned Big Ass Update: https://cyberneticshotokan.newgrounds.com/news/post/1517804

Hello! I am Devilman Shotokan, an aspiring Indie Artist and soon-to-be VTuber. I specialize in Traditional Illustration, but I also enjoy Creative and Analytical Writing. I’ve also been expanding the mediums I play around in. I’m a Demonic Reploid who’s Designed for Combat but Obsessed with Creation. Most tend to either call me Devilman or Shoto, either is fine by me. As well as Ray (Maybe. I Need To Think On That One A Bit). I’ve got a Deep Love for Art, the mediums I love most being Video Games, Animation, Film, Music, and Books/Comics. I try not to tie myself down with Genres too much, but I do have my Preferences which can be apparent. I Love Superheroes, Horror, Cartoons, and other Expressive Subjects like that. But do like more Down-to-Earth Stuff as well. I also enjoy studying Science, History, Art Culture, and Mythology. I’m always focused on my Art before any Streaming endeavors. But I do plan on balancing that out a bit more since Streaming is not only a Good Chance to have productive Downtime, but is a Great Way to connect to others and learn a bit more about the World.

Newgrounds is my Artistic Home Base. But DeviantArt is becoming a Close Second quickly. I Love Exploring both Wholesome and Edgy Subject-Matter, often appreciating Art that blends the Two the most. I don’t Stream yet. But I plan to on Twitch, YouTube, Twitter, and any place that catches my Eye. I’ll add links to my Art Socials underneath this soon, and Edit this post to add more in the Future.

LinkLog (If Linktree Wasn’t A Paid Service):

Main Twitter:

https://x.com/cyberneticshot1

DeviantArt:

https://www.deviantart.com/thedevilmansden

Substack:

https://substack.com/@devilmandiaries2

SFW Twitter:

https://x.com/dendevilmans

NSFW Twitter:

https://x.com/devildungeons

Bluesky (Not Twitter):

https://bsky.app/profile/devilmanshotokan.bsky.social

I plan to spend more balanced amounts of Time here and at the others from now on. But I spend a lot of Time on Twitter since despite its deserved reputation it still can be a Great Source of Interaction and Information. So if you’d like to see me Brain Dump about whatever, that’s the Best Place. I’ve also got a SFW and NSFW Alt there if you’d like to cater the Intensity of the Content you’d see from me. Newgrounds and DeviantArt are MUCH better for Artistic Curation/Filtration tho. So if you’re only interested in my Art those are your Best Bets.

On a more Real World Note, I have the condition known as CMT (Charcot-Marie-Tooth. Not Country Music Television). It’s a form of both Muscular Dystrophy and a Neurological Disorder, it also affects my Immune System to a degree. I am very fortunate to have a variation of the Condition that leaves me pretty much Able-Bodied, Martial Arts and Swimming being my Best Forms of Exercise to Combat the Muscular Degeneration (Fortunately I Can Also Build Muscle Fast Which Helps). However, even though it’s been nearly a decade since; it did lead to me suffering from a Week of Strokes/Seizures back in 2015. I’m also a Soul who’s seen a lot in its Time. But despite some of the Harrowing Shit I’ve been through, some which No Person should Suffer. This World has shown me more Kindness than not. So since I was Young, I figured being an Artist/Entertainer would be the Best Way I could contribute to Humanity without getting in it’s way. Since I could help inspire those more Practically Useful than myself while doing what I can in my own Life. The Last Few Years I’ve had to come to terms with a lot, and felt the grip of Insanity in the process. But 2024 has been a Year of Healing and getting back on Track. Despite it’s own difficulties at times.

Here’s a few more things from my “Pin Prime” on Twitter to inform ya’ll about me. And a News Post about this Year that includes an Earlier Post detailing the Plans I have for the Foreseeable Future.

https://cyberneticshotokan.newgrounds.com/news/post/1486158

• If I Retweet/Share your Work and you'd rather I not, just let me know and I'll take it down soon after.

Figured now that I'm sharing Music/Other’s Creations on my Socials I should be clear on that.

I don't have the Tools I Want for Streaming yet.

But when I do expect these kinda Streams:

• Gaming

• Watchalongs

• DJ/Music Sharing Vibe Zones

• Creative Work Streams

• Storytelling Streams

• Interviews?

• News Streams?

• TTRPG Streams

• Content Warning: The Beware of Content isn't just to sound Cute. If you follow, we’ll frankly expect Horrific and Explicit Material. I won't retweet anything Hyper Lewd/Hyper Gory except in October for Spooky Season.

• I believe that Anyone should make Any Art they desire. I have things I don't like Subject-Wise but l will not Demonize you unless your Personality/Demeanor/Conduct is Condemnable. And while I don't want a Hivemind of Followers I hope you all can do the same.

• Furthermore I do not like Policing Jokes or Art. At all if I can help it. But if you’re going for straight-up Harassment get the Fuck out of here. Having Heated Debates is one thing, Harassment’s another.

• That said: I do not believe a Block should be a Forever Thing. Not that I'll make a habit of reversing blocks, but I don't like the Idea of Permanently Burning Bridges.

• For an actual list of what to expect for Content to be Wary Of, from myself and people I follow:

• Bloody Gory Horror

• Extreme Sexual Content

• Political Expression/Exploration

• This isn't technically my NSFW Account, or a Political/Drama Focused Space. But I don’t like Restriction.

• VTubing-Related Concerns: I may be very interested in it, and open to RP (When TTRPG Is Involved) as well as having Lore I'm building quietly. But I'm not playing into a Character with my VTubing Endeavors. It's more for an Avatar to have.

• As of November 29, 2024; I’m still in Pre-Debut VTweeter phase. But I plan to start Streaming within 2025. And am close to being done with Preparations.

• Figured I'd put this here for Future Reference: I go by Eastern Standard Time, in the U.S.

• I am not in a position to pay for Commissions right now, nor getting paid for my own services. I just learned I can Donate on Streams without fucking up my Disability. Maybe. But that mostly goes towards Necessities/Bills. Merch is an Easy Buy tho. This should be resolved sometime in 2025.

• One Thing I really want to do is start doing Reviews on Indie Art and Artists. Especially for Games and Animation. Because there's so much out there that's Underrated. And given how unappreciated these Mediums I Love still are, I want to do my part to aid changing that.

• I'm not looking to foster a Community but a Vibe. One that can swap back and forth from talking about Cutesy Shit, Edgy/Risqué Shit, or Serious Shit whenever. Not interested in policing Followers or Callouts too. At least not really for the latter.

• I have to deal with Health Issues, and bouts of PTSD. So forgive me if I disappear at Times, go on unhinged rants, or frankly discuss either. I'm avoiding that nowadays but this Decades seen both get worse. Tho in 2024 my Mentality has Restabilized quite a bit so that's a Plus.

• I’m getting more open to taking Art Requests. It'll be a Good Way to practice discipline with my Art and warmup for Commissions. I'll apply the same rules I'm cooking tor Comms. 4-8 a month. First come First serve. Maybe 2-4 at a time will be a better start tho. Currently Crafting a TOS/Comm Sheet.

• My DMs are always open to chat, Business or Casual. A big part of my reason for making Art Socials is to talk to others and learn perspectives. I can also be Flirty and Affectionate. But I’m not looking for Relationships.

I’ll edit this to add things like Schedules and Links in the Future. Maybe I’ll add some of my Favorite Art/Writing as a sampler too. All of that will be underneath this. But for now that’s really all you need to know about me. Enjoy your stay in The Devilman’s Den!

First addition to this new edition of the Artist Introduction is a list of plans for 2025 I wrote a bit ago, check it out if interested! Anything I can’t complete this year will be pushed into the next as always.

https://cyberneticshotokan.newgrounds.com/news/post/1509131

3/5/2025: You know how I mentioned wanting to really spruce up my Artstyle?

Well. Yesterday I got a steal, I found an Art Set comprised of 175 PIECES for TEN BUCKS. Including Acrylic Paints, Watercolors, Metallic Watercolors, Watercolor Pencils (Didn’t Know Those Existed), Colored Pencils, Oil Pastel Crayons, Charcoal Sticks, and various tools (Like Palettes, Palette Knives, Brushes, Erasers, etc).

The Quality of the set is still up to question but I couldn’t refuse. A Great Way to test out tools I haven’t used much before getting Expensive Versions of each!

First Things First: While I’m technically not back yet, I am keeping an eye on these daily again because apparently while I was gone some Shitstain impersonated my Twitter and got a follower of mine hacked temporarily.

Anyway on to the actual updates.

With Spring rolling around pretty soon, despite it being colder than a witch’s tit these past few days, I’m going be doing some Major Spring Cleaning. Both of my Home and my Art Accounts, for the latter I’m mainly focusing on my Twitters and DeviantArt. I’m debating whether to keep my Twitter a “Hard PG-13” or just going full 18+ with it. I’m less concerned with that for Newgrounds and DA because especially with NG its moderation/content filtration is good. As for Bluesky I still don’t know how good it is there, but I’ll still make an SFW/NSFW Alt for it.

In other news, I could potentially be ready for Paid Work soon! The thing that’s been holding me back is waiting for my Sis’s Disability being cleared so I can discuss with my providers how much I can work for and how many hours. Hopefully that’ll all be settled by Early Summer, maybe sooner! I’ve already got Prototype Comm Sheets and an Artist TOS ready to go. But they’ll probably need tweaking.

But after this round of Spring Cleaning (And During), I’ll be researching Tech and Art Tools to acquire in the near future. I’m planning on sprucing up my Style soon, and Writing more often again. Analytical and Creative. I feel like I’ll need a bit more Life Experience to really make any Original Fiction of mine worthwhile, but I do have ideas I’ve had since before I started my Art “Career” and I won’t improve my Creative Writing waiting for Life Experience.

I’d like to start regularly writing Reviews again as well. From Art Reviews to the silly “Booze Revooze” Series I started last year. If there’s one boon to being Disabled, it’s having Time to really take things in and explore a lot of Art. I especially want to dedicate a lot of Time exploring what Newgrounds has to offer. Along with other Art Sites. I’ve been taking time out to keep up with Newer Works as well as catching up on Older Stuff too on Art Sites and more Mainstream stuff. So I’ll definitely have stuff to analyze. And draw Fanart of. Some Examples being the Ultimate and Absolute Lines of Marvel and DC Comics (Check ‘Em Out, They’re Awesome So Far).

But yeah, I guess that’s it for now. I’ll be making another Artist Introduction post that’ll have this linked in it. It’s gonna be the same routine until some Major Development happens. Whether that’s something like Streaming and/or a new Major Creative Project or a Big Life Development I feel the need to share and adapt to. Hope to release some new work soon while exploring others’.

Take Care, Kick Ass, and Have Fun.

Signed, Devilman Shotokan.

March 14th.

That seems like a good time to return. We’re all doing better, despite being exhausted and still grieving.

I wish Religion brought me more comfort than anger. I’m prepared for it not to be, but I hope that they’re happy somewhere. And we’ll meet again.

One More Thing.

Just to kinda settle this while I’m level-headed. I’ll be gone at least a month or until springtime. And I’ll still be drawing and planning creative projects out at the very least. Today was fairly decent, we’re all just trying to pull ourselves together.

Had some fun and good times the last few days together as well. Checked out Secret Level, that Witcher “OVA”, and the first few episodes of the new Spider-Man Series (It’s Really Good) and kept eachother company when awake.

I finally cried my eyes out this morning before I slept. It’s absolutely unfair, but we gave her a good long life and comforted her pups to the absolute best we could. And finally bawling felt better than the cold and malice filled depression I was in. Still devastated, but better.

I might pop into my Art Accounts just to check out newer work, drowning in Creativity and Study usually helps a lot. But until I return I’m gonna be ghosting around quietly if I’m around.

Trying to balance my Love and Hate for Existence again. Same Old Shit It’s Been Really.

This was written over the course of the night uploading this. Finished now in the early morning.

Unfortunately the pups have joined their mother. We’ve all been exhausting ourselves tending to them. The living mother and her pups are doing great, thriving even. But sadly the other litter just degraded after seeming relatively fine. The Healthiest just passed.

This has been some of the hardest few days of all our lives. I finally just cried now.

I’m going to spend the next few weeks like I’ve been w/ Family. It hasn’t been Entirely Miserable like I’ve said before but it’s been so hard. I imagine I’ll be gone for a month or two. Bye ✌️

Correction:

The Pup is still here, but sadly it’s likely that she won’t make it.

I’m really hoping since she’s the strongest but I don’t know.

She fought for 2 hours after this. But then fell asleep one more time peacefully just a bit ago.

This’ll be my last update until I return. I’ll have more time because the First Litter/Mother are very healthy, but I wrote this while crying. See you around Springtime.

Live Life.

I need to be gone for a while.

One of the Mothers died. Her condition unexpectedly got much worse. She just passed before we could get her to the vet. My Sister and Father took it very hard. First time I heard him cry.

I feel absolutely empty, except for wanting to help them.

Goodbye for now.

Edit. 10:42, 2/14/25: I don’t know how long I’ll be away.

This Decade has taken away so many loved ones from me. Animal and Person. Unfortunately, Death has always lingered around me it seems. But this decade I’ve lost loved ones nearly back to back each year. Suddenly. Ones I’ve loved for years.

Losing connections to my childhood, experiencing the most painful parts of growing up again and again.

Frankly I’m scared I haven’t cried yet. I haven’t been totally miserable all day. I’ve managed to even have some laughs.

But I’ve felt Cold, Empty, and Angry all day.

I don’t know how long I’ll be away.

But I need to take care of my Family, and not let this sadness and emptiness pause my Life.

It’s been this same damn cycle for my entire Adulthood so far. But I’ll be damned if it consumes me like it has. I’ll catch you later. Goodbye.

The part that hurts the most. Is that I prayed, begged for it not to happen. But God didn’t listen. And now I’m hearing pups cry out for a Mother who’s no longer there. But instead of making me cry, it’s boring a hole into my chest.

I want to Kill God, and Death.

That’s a bit too shitty of a note to potentially leave for weeks on. No matter how true.

Take care of yourselves folks.

I’ll be alright, so will my Family. It was just so sudden and unfair, but we’ve had her a long time and she had a Good Life. The Pups are Strong too.

And the Mother of the other litter is taking care of them too. We’re all working as a unit like we do.

Anyway that’s enough for now.

I’ll likely be back in a few weeks. Not sure how long exactly but however long is needed. I’ll still work on stuff as well.

Take Care

Ok little update before I Log Off for the Night. Making this into a Newgrounds News Post (Hi) too so I can reshare it for the time being when necessary. Nothing too huge, but those dogs of mine I was talking about have given birth now. Still gonna be Puppysitting/Housekeeping.

But, the Mothers are doing good, are taking care of the pups well, and my other dogs are being mindful. For now, I’ll have a bit more Time than I’ve been expecting. Gonna help take care of ‘em until we rehome ‘em. When/If they’re grown and still around I’ll be occupied again.

But for now the shit’s calmed down a bit around here. ‘Bout to focus on a few different things with my Art Shit that I’ll fill you in on here. 

• Renovating My Socials

• Looking Into Tech I’ll Need

• Doing Some More Random Art

• Working On Art Series

• Edgy Art Arc II

The Main Ones I’m focusing on are the Renovations, Tech Search, and Art Series before the others. Pretty Self-Explanatory All. I’ll be fucking about on my Socials too, probably gonna make an Art-Only Twitter (Maybe) and really work on my SFW/NSFW Accounts there. 

Anyway Night!

Gonna be pretty busy this week, Dog just had Pups and our other female is due soon as well (Sneaky Ass Male Got ‘Em During December). Taking Time away from Art to help take care of them, give them new homes, and get the Females fixed. IRL Responsibilities Time. I’ll be around tho

I’ll try to get Art in when I can, but yeah gonna be Dogsitting and Housesitting for a Good While.

Feel Better than I’ve been after today which is Nice. Feeling Motivated

Edit (2/11/25): Gosh these are going to be a LONG few weeks, spent the whole night Dogsitting and Firekeeping.

It’s possible I might not have much time for Art at all for a little while at least.

Might end up being my biggest break from Drawing in YEARS.

Unfortunately a few pups passed.

One was stillborn and one was very sickly. The rest seem strong tho. Emotional Night, not completely morose this ain’t my first rodeo raising animals. That aspect’s never easy tho.

Anyway I’m gonna try to pass out now. See you guys soon